Twenty years ago, someone gave me and my wife a gift that shaped the destiny of our children.
It was a book that contained one simple principle we've been using for the past two decades: every child has an emotional tank. When their tank is full, children have a great capacity for being happy, understanding you and obedient. But when their tank is low, they tend to be unhappy, find it difficult to understand, and are inclined to disobey.
But how does this apply to business?
Every adult has an emotional tank too. And when adults’ emotional needs are met, they seem to understand things much more quickly.
I first discovered this myself when I was learning a new procedure:
Then, I realized it wasn't my fault.
As I double-checked myself, I recognized that I was bringing an eager desire to learn, an open mind and a willingness to understand.
But it wasn’t about me—I eventually saw that others were also having difficulties understanding the same “teachers” I was struggling with.
The problem lay with the messenger.
Fill that tank!
If you are trying to communicate something with the objective of getting a task done, there are four tank-filling steps you can do to produce quick understanding.
Don’t skip a step!
Remember: when you feel resistance, do not try to bulldoze ahead. Why? It will take you twice as long to achieve understanding.
The next time you need to get understanding across quickly to a listener, connect with them, frame your message to appeal to their interests, use word pictures and stories, and inquire into their conclusions. If there is resistance, reflect back the essence of the feeling in your own words.
Doing this will help you become understood in half the time—and let you get back to your work.
Co-Founder of Juice Inc, Thought Leader & Author
Co-Founder of Juice Inc.
General Manager and Director of Sales
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